Zermatt

It's been six years since Nick's great European adventure. He and Elizabeth went to Europe. We had all planned to go, but I had to go to Panama, so they went, and Alex stayed in Boston.

Nicholas had wanted to go to Zermatt. They flew to Paris, then traveled by train to Geneva, and from there to Zermatt (Elizabeth was experiencing a bit of her Swiss roots, but for Nick this was pure adventure and the Alps). The weather in Zermatt was cloudy and unseasonably cold on the day they had planned to take the cog railway up to the top.

I'd never heard of this attraction. If you're like me, you need to know a few details. This is what the official site says:

"With its sunny viewing platform that can be reached throughout the year, the Gornergrat, at an altitude of 3,089 m above sea level, has been the top tourist destination in Switzerland for the last 111 years. The panorama is considered to be one of the most beautiful: the Monte Rosa Massif with the highest Swiss mountain (the Dufourspitze at 4,634 m above sea level), and a view over the second-largest glacier in the Alps, the Gornergletscher, as well as 29 peaks higher than 4000 metres – and everything almost so close that you could almost touch them. You can climb up to the Gornergrat on the highest open-air cogwheel railway in Europe, which departs directly from the railway station in Zermatt. From here, you can climb the mountains 365 days a year with trains every 24 minutes – over impressive bridges, through galleries and tunnels, idyllic forests and alpine meadows, passing rocky gorges and mountain lakes. At your destination, you will find the highest altitude hotel in Switzerland, the 3100 Kulmhotel Gornergrat. Complete with restaurant, observatory and shopping mall."

Here's what Nick saw.  His narration:

 

 

For what he missed, go to the Zermatt site's video clip, which shows the more normal summer view from the top.  There is also a good video of the cog railway trip and the viewing area at the top, at http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0gDOmJIKu_8.
 
Enough from me.

What are we doing here (2)?

Alex turned 25 on Thursday. A quarter century of being parents for us. I can still feel the moment when he arrived as though it was a few hours ago. How it feels to be the father of one living child, and not two, is a much more complicated matter. It is always jarring, especially on good days, like today. Nick's absence is like a pendulum - it swings away at times, then comes hurtling back.

Eschatology

Four years ago today our lives as we knew them ended. Raising children, we worried about them when they were sick, when they were hurt, when they were late coming home, but the nameless dread of being a parent is so much more than I would ever have imagined. I learned that through long, terrifying hours at Lahey, after the horrific site of my car wrapped around a tree, the roof and doors peeled back so that the Lexington Fire crew could extract Nicholas, Frank and Paul. So many dreams ended that night, so much new reality was born. The falcon cannot hear the falconer.

Palimpsest

Nick's friends: This is a random post and a work in progress - it's been I while, and I thought it would be good to do a post on some of Nick's friends, now that he lives mostly in my and their memories. Why now? I suppose because many things come together - Nick's birthday, Mothers' day, Sara's graduation, the anniversary of Alex's graduation and of Bowdoin graduation, and Angie's graduation, each a writing and rewriting of life changes and memory onto a particular, glorious time of year. So, in no particular order: Will - should be finishing up his Fullbright year in Colombia! Will's semester abroad in Chile, parts of which are recorded in http://gringogigante.blogspot.com/, was memorable for many things, including the strongest earthquake since 1960 (not Will's doing). Sara - graduating! I am so happy - this was a tough thing to do. Sara wrote a piece for Newsweek, one year out: http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2008/12/05/remembering-the-perfect-boy.html. Frank - law school, Science Olympiad, front seat. Paul - graduated, back seat. Steve - Maine 3 - any one I have missed above - you guys have been great! Danny, John, Will, Shosh, Sophie, Zoe, Linda, Bobby, Angie, Ping. An amazing group. You write the next chapters.

Christmas 2010

Christmas is here again. I thought as Elizabeth and I were wrapping presents how perfect life was, and we did not know it. Sometimes it feels like the space between us and Nicholas is thinner, somehow. I think about how excited he and Alex would get about Christmas, the delicious tension between believing in Santa and trying to lift up our bed to see if there might be presents hidden there. Must close, as it's late. That's all for now.

My big boy

This is Nicholas at two and a half, sitting on the stairs at our house on Irving Street, outside Davis Square in Somerville. It was summer, and Nick is holding drumsticks. He had a toy drum set (borrowed from Alex, I think) which he loved to bang on. Some of you will recognize the drumsticks as chopsticks - but you also may remember that chopsticks make fine drumsticks. He's wearing his favorite red striped shirt - red was always his favorite color, from the time he was little.

In my mind's eye, this smile and those dancing eyes are Nick at every age. So many smiles.

It is three years today since Nick's death.

Nicholas links

http://orient.bowdoin.edu/orient/article.php?date=2007-11-30§ion=1&id=1